The Story of an Only Child

This story was shared with me today and I took some time to write it up.  I pray it touches your heart.  

When I was 16 years old, I was very close to my cousin.  She had been with her boyfriend since her freshman year and was entering her senior year of high school.  Her father had allowed her boyfriend to live with her and they got pregnant.  I struggled with the whole thing because I had just started my walk with Christ.  It was hard for me to know that she was pregnant and even harder to know she was considering an abortion.  At the time, I thought it was her choice.  I found out differently later, then, I was mortified to know that she was considering ending the life of her child.  And even more upset when she actually went through with it. 

Because of her pregnancy, abortion became an open subject in my family.  I found out that my aunt had also had an abortion and worse yet, I found out that my mom had had one when she was 19.  This was the hardest blow of all.  I had longed for a sibling since I was a child and to know that the only one I have is in heaven is rough.  I also found out from my grandmother that my mom had been advised to abort me as well.  I am obviously thrilled that she didn’t, but it’s a struggle knowing that I was the one given life instead of my sibling. 

My mom is very casual about her abortion and doesn’t seem to know what an impact it had on me.  I still struggle with the knowledge of it.  I look forward to meeting my sibling, my cousin, and my cousins child when I get to heaven, but it’s difficult knowing that my mom, my aunt, and my cousin chose to end life instead of give life. 

My reason for sharing is that I want you to know that an abortion doesn’t just impact you and the baby’s father.  It impacts everyone down the line.  You are ending the life of your future children’s siblings.  The life of a cousin.  The life of a niece or nephew.  Your decision to end life impacts many people around you.  It will hurt your children and other family members from that point on. 

I still fight with being mad about my family member’s choices.  I recently talked with my cousin.  It’s now been 11 years since her abortion.  I found out that it was her father who told her to have the abortion and she felt she had to respect his decision and do what he’d told her to do since she was living under his roof.   She thinks about the abortion every day and prays she didn’t ruin her body and that one day, she’ll be able to carry another child.  I used to respect my uncle, but now he has also lost my respect.  Even more though, I’m sad that my cousin didn’t feel like she could reach out to me or someone else to offer her support.  We also talked recently about how normally, she can get through the pain when she hears people talk about it, but recently, she was watching a show where they performed an abortion and she just lost it.  It breaks my heart to know that she will always live with that pain.  

180

Yesterday, I watched an incredible movie.  "180" is a movie that has the potential to make you do a 180 turn in your thinking.  Please, please, please watch it.

If you have teenagers, watch it with them.

If you have younger children, watch it with them.

If you have parents, tell them to watch it.

Watch this movie because "those who forget history are destined to repeat it."

My favorite quote from this movie is, "Everyone needed to rise up...Where was the world?  Where was everybody?"

I will warn you, there are some graphic images near the beginning, so you may want to watch it through once before watching it with your children.  I am VERY sensitive to these types of images, so I did close my eyes a few times, but I still completely recommend this movie.

More Lives than One

A good friend of mine sent me this story that she was willing to share.  It wasn't easy for her to share and has asked to remain anonymous.  I pray that it touches your heart as you read.  

This story happened many years ago.  I was raised in a Christian home where we all heard "the talk" and knew exactly what was expected of us by our parents and what God desired for our lives in that area.  My sister had a one night stand that was supposed to be a date my brother and his wife arranged for her and she got pregnant.  She told no one except my brother and he paid for her abortion.  My sister was so afraid of telling my mom and dad what had happened that she just assumed that was her only choice.  

The really sad part of the story is what happened next. Not only did a baby die, but a promising life was ruined. My sister went to college and tried to have a "normal" life.  She became an LPN and had a good job, but living with the memory of what she had done kept interfering.  She started to drink to forget.  Then she started using marijuana because alcohol wasn't enough.  As a nurse, she had access to other drugs as well and she started pinching a little here and there from the "medications".  

By the age of 21, my sister was an addict and an alcoholic.  By 24 or so she had lost her nurse's license and been banned from the medical field.  

It didn't stop there.  She has lost every job she ever had, been married and divorced twice, has a daughter who is following in her footsteps, and been in prison twice.  We had a family intervention and she actually went to rehab for quite awhile.  During that time she came to realize that having the abortion was wrong and that she would never be okay until she found forgiveness.  We were very hopeful that she was on the right track.  However, her addiction is so strong that she cannot stay clean.  She just crashed again after being clean for a year, during which she was actually sounding and acting sane.

My sister's abortion didn't just effect her.  A baby(my niece) died, my sister lost herself, and our family lost relationships that are still not fixed to this day.  My brother's marriage fell apart.  And the grief my parents felt when they found out is indescribable. There is no such thing as keeping it a secret.  Your heart knows and God knows, even if no one else does. 

 

Abortion is not the answer.  It just brings a new set of problems.  I wish I had known about my sister in time to help her through the crisis.

Life Chain is One Week Away!

Life Chain is one of the opportunities we have each year to exercise our first amendment rights.  Each year, on the first Sunday of October, Pro-Life Americans around the country gather together to pray for the unborn children who are in danger.  Here is the website's statement.  

LIFE CHAIN is a peaceful and prayerful public witness of pro-life individuals standing for 90 minutes praying for our nation and for an end to abortion.  It is a visual statement of solidarity by the Christian community that abortion kills children and that the Church supports the sanctity of human life from the moment of conception until natural death.

My family has participated in Life Chain for the past several years and it is a great experience.  If you've never done anything to speak for those who cannot speak for themselves, this is a great start.  You won't be alone and you won't have to speak with anyone if you don't want to.  We have had people stop and talk to us, but you can always refer them to your group leader if you are uncomfortable.  

To find a branch of the Life Chain near you, just look here and find your state on the left.  If there is not a branch of the Life Chain close by, you can organize your own with all the resources on the website.  

If you have children, bring them.  This is an amazing opportunity to share with them your conviction that life is important.  They will see first hand that you are doing all you can to make a difference and they will be a part of making a difference themselves.  

Lastly, if your pastor is not announcing the area Life Chain, call them now!  This is next Sunday, so you won't have a chance to tell them about it and ask them to announce it if you don't call them ahead of time.  Even better, if your church has a calling chain, put it on there so everyone knows.  The longer the Life Chain is, the more impact it will have.  

The Other Talk Part Two

This is a continuation of yesterday's post.  If you missed it, you can view it here.  

Very shortly after, she and her boyfriend (who was old enough to be jailed for dating her) went to the local Planned Parenthood Clinic. I had on several occasions prior to this encouraged Angela not to go through with an abortion, but her mind was made up and it didn't seem like there was anything to do, in order to change it.  She was taken into the procedure room, and she later confided in me that she had a change of heart.  She began to kick and scream, and even hit the nurse.  She told them she changed her mind. and "NOT to take HER Baby!" they however sedated her, and did the procedure anyway.  She now lives with remorse that few others can understand.

As a 14 year old I thought I did everything I could.  It wasn't until a few months later when my parents had "The Other Talk" with my sister and I that I realized how foolish I had been.   Another girl, this one about to graduate from High School and a member of my church youth group, found herself in the same situation. The difference was that the first adult to help this young mother was a  Christian, who encouraged her above everything, to not kill her child.  My parents knew about this incident and sat my sister and I down and told us, that if we ever had a friend who was in this same situation, that they could help.  We could bring our friend home and they would do all they could to help.  How foolish I was not to take the burden of my 14 year old scared friend to my parents.  If I had, the situation may have turned out so differently, and there might be a precious 12 year old child here today adopted to a deserving family because of it. 

We cannot forget our children are just that, children.  Proverbs 22:15 says "Foolishness is bound in the heart of a Child."  I was foolish, I was only 14.  It never occurred to me to betray my friend's trust and go to my parents for help.  I didn't get it then, I thought I was doing all I could.  I'm not sure what would have happened if my parent's would have had "The Other Talk" any sooner, I'm sure they didn't imagine at 14 I'd know anyone who was pregnant let alone another 14 year old. Even if I would have taken her home to my parents for help, things may have turned out the same way, but I honestly doubt it.

For the remainder of the school year Angela wore a cloud everywhere she went.  She talked about how she was relieved and grieving all in the same breath.  I tried to comfort her the best I could, even now I still should have gone to my parents.  At the end of the year I gave her a Gideon's Bible and told her, to never throw it out even if she didn't believe in God.  I told her to read to read it when she felt troubled.  After our Freshman year in High School we no longer had any classes together and Angela seemed to avoid me.  I think I reminded her of a year she wanted to forget, I was one of the few with whom she shared her secret.  Right before we were both to graduate she stopped me in the halls of school one day and said, "Do you remember the Bible you gave me our Freshman year?" I nodded, " I still read it sometimes."  That was it, our last real conversation.  I pray she's found Christ's forgiveness, because only then can she forgive herself.

Even if you home school, even if your children are in a Christian school, tell them that you would not only be willing to help them if they get into trouble, but any of their friends as well.  A young girl, or woman, who find herself pregnant out of wedlock (or young man whose girlfriend is in the same situation) finds herself scared and hearing so many voices telling her an abortion is the quick and simple solution.  The world says an abortion will make the problem go away.  When in reality not only does a child die, but the guilt from having an abortion is literally haunting and Christ's forgiveness is the only solution. 

It's hard not to blame myself for not getting this young girl real help, in the end I know it was her choice, and I know God has forgiven me for my role in this; but I truly hope this story can prevent the same type of tragedy from happening to our children's friends and acquaintances.

Bio:

Kasey is a wife to a future Pastor, and a mother to two fantastic children.  Her priority is raising her little ones and being the best wife possible but she is also the music leader at her church and teaches several  hours a week at a local Bible College. She writes at www.lessonsfromivy.com where she shares encouragement and the lessons God teaches her from her day to day life.

The Other Talk Part One

The following blog was submitted by a reader who wanted to share her story. This is a story for ALL of us to read and learn a lesson from. I chose this as the first story for this blog because it teaches something so important for all pro-lifers to remember.  I'll be sharing it over the course of two posts, so be sure to read the conclusion tomorrow.  

The Other Talk

As parents we all know how important it is to instill our values and beliefs in our children.  Particularly in spiritual matters.  We desire our children to have a genuine relationship with God and do all that we can to protect it.  We set boundaries, we limit who they spend time with, what they are doing outside of our home and we have "The Talk."  You know the one, "The Talk" where we lay out our expectations for moral and spiritual purity.  "The Talk" that explains how babies are made and the fact that the process is a precious gift that should only  be shared between a husband and his wife.  "The Talk" that says if you ever make a mistake (hopefully this won't happen if boundaries are in place) your father and I love you more than anything and we will always love you, you can come to us with anything.  My mother and father had all these talks with us but "The other Talk" I'd like to mention today unfortunately came a few months too late, and a baby never had a chance at life because of it. (Some non-essential details in the following story are changed for privacy)

When I was a 14 year old girl I had a friend (I'll call her Angela) who was very much, not a Christian.  School was the only place I'd see her, and to this day I'm not sure why she picked me as a friend.  We were different in about every way imaginable, but I suppose I was kind and High School girls in general can be very mean, so we were friends when school was in session.  She ran however, with a very different type of crowd after school hours.  Angela would tell me about her new boyfriend and their "escapades," I'd tell her she was foolish and shouldn't do those type of things.  Angela soon learned I wouldn't tolerate her stories of misbehaviors and our conversations generally focused on what boys in our class were good-looking or our school work.  Then one day our conversations took a very different tone when she confided in me that she was pregnant.

My parents had always instilled in me, and I believed with all my heart that an unborn life is just as alive as you or I.  I told Angela she shouldn't get an abortion, but at 14 I had no real idea how to help her, where to send her, or what to do.  I just had  a conviction with no real solutions.  Angela was terrified, she didn't tell her boyfriend for many months and she didn't tell her parents.  I finally convinced her to see a school counselor, I figured that she could at least help Angela tell her parents.  Angela asked if I would go with her.

As we sat in the counselor's office waiting, Angela looked as if she would crumble at any moment.  When the counselor came in and asked what was wrong, Angela broke down and told her that she was pregnant.  A desperate 14 year old girl was sitting there and the first adult she had turned to for help immediately suggested abortion.  I was horrified.   Soon after the meeting with the counselor, Angela told her parents, she was now nearly 5 months pregnant.  Her parents told her they would support whatever her decision was, whether to have her baby or abort it.  

Hope for Tomorrow

The video I just uploaded at the top of the blog is incredible.  It was sent to me by a world-traveling photographer and not only are the pictures amazing, the message is too.  With biblical answers to some of the hardest questions those facing an unwanted pregnancy ask, it truly does provide hope for tomorrow.  I would encourage you to visit the photographer's site where you can order the presentation in booklet format.  These would be great for churches or other pro-life organizations to have on hand and share with those who need hope.  Here is just a sample of what you'll find in the video.

Welcome to Rachel's Voice

This is a different kind of blog than any I thought I might be writing a year ago.  I've thought of writing photography blogs, parenting blogs, personal blogs, music blogs, and book blogs.  I never thought I would be writing this kind of blog.  But over the past year, God has been slowly working in my heart.  He has been teaching me the importance of doing something life-changing for Him.  This is not your ordinary blog.  This blog is meant to be a voice.  And not just anyone's voice, but a voice for those who do not yet have voices of their own.  The voice of one bitterly weeping for her children who are no more.

Rachel's Voice.

You see, God has been leading me to do something for those little ones who cannot do anything for themselves.  I've struggled with this because with two little ones of my own to take care of, it's difficult to get out there and volunteer.  I do my best to go to the rallies in the area and I do feel that those things are important.  But I do not feel like that is enough.

Is it really enough to stand quietly on the roadside holding a sign twice a year?

Is it enough to have a bumper sticker on the back of your car?

Is it enough to call your senator or representative when bills come before them?

Maybe for you it is.  But for me, I have been feeling God's constant prodding and it is not enough.

And so I begin a journey, not knowing where it will lead.  I know this blog is going to include some very basic things.  I will be posting about events, legislation, and other pro-life issues as I hear about them.  But the real purpose of this blog is to reach out to people who may be struggling with a life-changing (and possibly life-ending) decision.  That's where I need your help.

While standing on the roadside holding a pro-life sign, many people drive by shouting things.  One of the things that was ingrained in my memory was a young girl who rolled down her window and shouted, "You don't know what it's like!  You've never been there!"  She was right.  I don't know what it's like to not want a child.  I don't know what it's like to live in fear of people finding out I'm pregnant.  But I know there are people out there who do know what that is like.  I know there are people who have made those hard choices.  Those are the stories that need shared.  Those are the stories that will change lives.  Those are the stories that will save lives.

So I'm urging you.  If you have a story of how you saved a life, is God prompting you to share it?  Maybe you have a story of how you didn't save a life and your life was never the same.  Will you share it?  Do you have a story of how you chose to give a child life and now your life has been changed for the better?  All these stories are worth sharing and if they can even save one life, it is worth it.  Please, consider telling your story so another life might be saved.

If you have a story you would be willing to share, send it to me in an email.  You can send it anonymously or with your name.  I will post it with or without your name, whichever you prefer.  If you would rather share your story with me and have me write it up, we can do that too.  Please pass this on to your family and friends.  The goal is to reach as many as possible.  You never know who is struggling with a life or death decision and who these stories will touch.

One last request.  If you have nothing to share, just pray.

Pray that God will continue to work in the lives of those making critical decisions.

Pray that He will use whatever means He can to save lives.

Pray that protection of life will be at the forefront of our minds so we will do whatever we can to save innocent lives.